Dear Old Me,
How many times have you experienced drama and pain because of something you assumed was true, only to find out it wasn’t? How hard have you cried? How much have you suffered and caused suffering for others because you believed a lie. Lies that you either told yourself, or lies that someone told you. How many times have you wallowed in pain because you thought no one understood you or your situation? The truth is that no one will ever understand unless you tell them.
I know for a fact that these assumptions keep you locked up in a self-imposed prison. You will only be able to leave and live in happiness if you find a way to communicate clearly with the people around you. When you learn how to say what you need and want and learn how to ask others what they need and want you will be able to achieve anything in life including winning the battle with your weight. Finding the courage to ask questions and express what you want will set you free.
Now, believe me. This is no easy task. It will take the courage of a lion to speak with honesty and integrity and it will take even more fearlessness to ask questions and truly listen when given the answer. When you find yourself afraid of what others may say or do than those are the times when you must speak. If you do not stop assuming you will only continue to experience drama and pain.
Be optimistic when speaking your mind. Don’t assume that the other party will behave a certain way or respond negatively. You have no idea how they will react or what they see in their world. Optimism and courage are contagious. When you are brave enough to say what you want and need without assuming the outcome will be negative, the people in your life find their own courage to speak their truths as well. By facing every situation from a place of optimism you are already half way there. Those around you will follow your lead. They will know that they do not or should not assume anything with you. They can speak their minds without fear because they will know that you will truly listen with optimism.
If I could somehow reach out to you and give you this wisdom when you really needed it, I would. By the definition of wisdom, I suppose that to become wise we must experience life. We must fail so we can learn, but do we have to experience pain and drama to be wise? Maybe, just maybe with the courage to speak up we can avoid the pain of failure. Maybe we can try and fail without fear, speak out about how we feel, gather strength from others around by asking for help and clarification from them when we do not understand, and then move on with the wisdom of that experience? I truly believe that by never assuming others know what you think, want and need and never, ever assuming that you know what others think, want or need that wisdom without pain is possible.
Until next time,
The New You